when I started this blog five years ago, I was a pet sitter and the name animal-crackers made sense. now I'm a stay-at-home-dad and freelance writer, but rather than confuse everyone by getting a different blog, it's just easier to keep posting things here.

Dylan had his second visit to the pediatrician today. He's 9 pounds 4 ounces. A week ago he was 8 pounds 10 ounces, and 11 days ago when he was discharged he weighed 8 pounds 5 ounces.

His chubby little cheeks belie his screaminghabenero reflux, shaky lungs and high blood pressure. Every evening about this time, his stomach bubbles over. A long bouncy walk is the only thing that seems to calm it.

Yesterday while Andrea was out, I tried keeping Dylan in the swing with his pacifier. But he wouldn't have it. In Josh's words:

"Dad, Dylan won't keep his stupid freakin binky in his mouth."

Guess I need to shut my stupid freakin mouth.

In other news, we received the bill for Dylan's hospital stay.

$615,693.13

That's not counting the $156,000-plus that the doctors have billed.

I've never before seen -- and probably never will see -- a single bill totaling $615,693.13. Our portion: $0.00. Damn, that feels good.

And in other, other news, guess who dropped his first turd into the toilet today? I only mention it so years from now Josh will be horribly embarrassed.